in_my_space

In my Space

I look at the sky
Because I cannot bear to look into your eyes
I look at the ground
Because I cannot bear to look around.
I cannot speak,
My heart is too weak

But I must share
For others to care
So, timidly I stand
And speak my mind
So quietly...
And for such shortest time
And with dismay
I watch the way
Faces change, change, change
Anger boiling
Self-control toiling
Started by audacity
Breaking their capacity
And bursting out against my small bubble.

Like waves on rocks,
And my ears boxed,
What am I to do?
Who am I to say?
Do I run? Do I stay?
Let myself feel abuse,
Or take after a recluse?
Oh, ever so discouraging!

I was the tiny spark
That in the gathering dark
Lit the flames in the sky
Way way up high.....
Above my head.... emotions fly
The war was started and well moving
One battle on the grounds of proving....
Is might right?
Or can the little voice in the dark,
that tiny glimmering spark
Be a solution
not an obtrusion?
or must he be like me,
sitting in my little space,
note book on my knee
the battle raging in my face?

From counsel to open forum
to closed and the open for them...
Everything is destroyed
In tears, not of joy
but of pain,
tears all the same.

Can I be
Plain old me
Or should I change
to prearranged
settings found
on the proving ground?

Graphic: "Quandary"
(nctm.org.)